Returning to My Homeland

There is no honey that tastes sweeter than this life. The bulky orange sun gently toasts my skin to a richer shade of cocoa.

The soft breeze follows; taking with it any worry or trouble that resides in my heart. This is what life is supposed to feel like.

As we rest, cushioned on my grandmother's open veranda, I tilt my head slightly to my right; snatching a quick glance at my mother's golden face.

Something tells me that her glow is not just because of the blazing sun. She is at peace, and I can almost see her in complete youthfulness.

I sit cross legged, each knee softly grazing that of my mother’s and grandmother respectively.

Three generations all in one place, one moment.

Sipping milky tea while exchanging warm smiles and hearty laughs; I can't help but list in my mind all the moments I once deemed to be perfect, because all those moments combined together still would never come close to this very moment right here-with my birth givers.

I sit grounded while my mind wanders in contemplation...

I was lost before. I used to dive and camouflage myself between the thick covers of good books and boys that weren't actually ever meant for me. I would sulk as my sister would trace her fingers down my hair, never failing to let me know that they were "never worth my tears".

A lot makes sense now; why I ate what I ate, why I spoke the way I did, the type of people I surrounded myself with... The truth is, I was just trying to find a little "home" in them.

But home is the humid air that fills my lungs and the soft breeze that soothes my skin. It is my grandmother's warm brown eyes surrounded by soft, wrinkly skin. It is the chink of tea glasses that eagerly await to be filled with warm deliciousness.

It is the vibrant colors and the mesmerizing patterns of the dirac that our women wear. It is the sound of my mother; confidently conversing in a language that is for once hers, not the English that reminds her of fleeing, and war, and hardship.

Home is sweet. Home is here. Finally, somewhere I belong.